Every year, I believe the Browns will bring championship glory to Cleveland. This belief lasts until, roughly, the second quarter of the first game. The space where the belief once sat inside my soul is then replaced by shame and self-loathing until the NFL Draft. Then it’s time to believe again. Lather, rinse, repeat.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. As it stands, the Browns are headed to Phoenix in February! Here are my top reasons for fully believing the Browns will win the Super Bowl this year.

Depth

For the first time since Charlie Frye had a Bernie Kosar poster in his room, the Browns actually have quality, NFL-caliber depth at several positions. For instance, gone are the days of the un-athletic linebacking pupu platter. In its place we have Andra Davis, Willie McGinest (when healthy), Kameron Wimbley and D-Qwell Jackson anchoring the middle of the defense. Not bad.

The Law of Averages

Seriously. There have been 41 Super Bowls. The Browns haven’t won any. They haven’t played in any. Eventually this trend has to stop, the Browns have to win a Super Bowl. I firmly believe this.

Defense

Despite a so-so preseason, I have confidence in our defense. Our secondary has some decent depth: Gary Baxter (hopefully), Leigh Bodden, Sean Jones and Eric Wright. If we can get moderate play from the three up front, this will be formidable. Maybe we’ll actually sport a 3-4 this year instead of our usual 2 – 2 1?2.

Jamal Lewis isn’t a corpse

Lewis doesn’t look washed up like I suspected he would, and he actually has some of his pre-going-to-prison-for-selling-cocaine moves. Who says there aren’t heart-warming stories in sports?

Offensive line stability

I know it’s crazy, but our biggest weakness may turn into a strength, or at least a semi-non-weakness this year. Joe Thomas has promise; Kevin Shaffer is decent; Eric Steinbach is a stud; Ryan Tucker is less melancholy; and LeCharles Bentley can move his big toes. Good times.

Brady Quinn

Those two words just make me happy. I can’t help it. And it’s not only because of his boyish good looks. I think he’s the best quarterback we’ve had since returning to the NFL, and my annual lofty prediction can only happen with his right arm.

This team can’t even sniff .500-ball with Charlie Anderson and Derrick Frye constantly lobbing interceptions to the opposing team. I know it’s been an interesting strategy, hoping balls bounce off the other team and into our wide receivers’ arms, but it needs to stop this year. Maybe we’ll keep the run-to-the-2-yard-line-with-no-timeouts-to-end-the-half play though. That’s quality.

My prediction: The dreamboat will anchor himself under center by game six and lead us to the Super Bowl.

Bird Flu

In an environmental science class, my professor said bird flu could get to the United States in a few years and start killing people by the millions. If his prediction comes through this season, key players from the NFL will start dropping like flies. Thus, the Browns have a shot at the Super Bowl by default. How do I know Cleveland players won’t get it? All trends get to Ohio last.

Sure it’s a morbidly tragic way to finally take home the Lombardi Trophy, but I’ll take it. Go Browns!

Contact sports columnist Chris Crowell at [email protected].