Dublin does the United States of America
I am pleased to announce that Dublin Gunther Gill is the Kent Family Video “‘Hotel for Dogs’ Cutest Dog Picture Contest” winner. I received a voicemail yesterday confirming my suspicions that of the four dogs whose pictures were posted behind the counter at the Main Street location, Dublin was, indeed, the cutest. I could barely understand the voicemail yesterday, but the words “winner,” “dog” and “hotel” were enough. I called the store and found out I get to pick up the “Hotel for Dogs” DVD Tuesday when it’s released. That’s right, I will be among the masses lining up outside Family Video at 9 a.m. Tuesday.
Dublin asked that I release this statement from him:
“I am both flattered and humbled by this win. I would like to thank the countless Family Video patrons who voted for me, and also Kristine, without whose help my rising stardom could not have taken wing. Thank you for your votes. I hope I have earned your votes in the national election.”
There are two things I would like to point out in Dublin’s speech. The first is that the term “countless” was used very loosely. When I told Dublin of his win, he asked how many people voted. The girl I talked to from Family Video wasn’t sure. When I told this to Dublin, he thought I meant there were too many to count. He’s obviously a bit starstruck.
The second thing I would like to point out has to do with the upcoming national election. Because Dublin won at the local level, he will be advancing to the national contest, where dogs from Family Videos across the country will flash their best grins in the hopes of winning a free year of rentals from Family Video and a $500 gift card to SitStay.com, which is this sweet Web site full of awesome stuff for dogs, like boots and studded collars.
Dublin is ecstatic. He cannot wait for voting to open May 1. At that time, he wants everyone to vote for him from then to May 8 at FamilyVideo.com. Vote once, vote 10 times, vote 10 times an hour. Dublin’s newly found fame knows no bounds. Once he’s conquered this country, he’s expressed a desire to conquer neighboring countries.
And why limit this to Family Video? While Dublin acknowledges and appreciates the store that gave him one of his first real glimpses at stardom, he longs to spread his furry little wings. Dublin wants to take on other venues. He’s looking to sign with an agent and hoping to copyright his name and image. If you’d like Dublin to be at your child’s next birthday party, don’t delay! The waiting list is long, and prices increase by the day.
I am a proud, proud mama.
For the record, I never voted for Dublin. My roommate only voted once, and “countless” others voted in addition. This is what I call a legitimate win.
Kristine Gill is a junior newspaper journalism major and columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact her at [email protected].