Coming out week 2009: Coming out twice

This is the fourth of a week-long series of students’ coming out stories.

Kara Bindus had to come out twice. First she came out as bisexual. Second, she came out as gay.

When the sophomore English major was figuring out her sexuality, she eased into coming out by traveling across what she called the “bi bridge.”

She had three or four boyfriends before and soon discovered there was a reason the relationships didn’t feel right. She enjoyed boys’ personalities but didn’t want a relationship with them.

When she came to Kent State, she decided to try dating girls and then discovered she wasn’t just bisexual – she was gay.

She said family and friends didn’t care. But others weren’t so accepting.

Since coming out, she has received e-mails and Facebook messages saying people are praying for her or that she’s going to hell for being gay. It doesn’t phase her. She actually thinks the messages are funny.

But one time she got mad. She was having lunch at Luna’s Restaurant and was talking to her family about the consent age and statutory rape. A man at the table next to hers yelled at her, that he now had to answer his children’s questions about the topic and that she should watch what she says in public. It made Bindus shake with anger. She knew the man was angry because she used the word “gay.”

Now that she’s out, it feels “more freeing,” she said. But Bindus still experiments with her sexuality. She’s part of a drag king troupe that performs on the weekends.

“Kinging is a way that I can have a boyish side, but not have to dress like a boy all the time. I like to dress like a girl,” she said.

Contact diversity reporter Kelly Petryszyn at [email protected]